If you’re like me, when you first became a mom you wondered if you were doing it right. After all, we’re all trying to raise kids without sending ourselves or our kids to therapy…amiright? Over the years, I’ve become dedicated to both personal development. And that definitely applies to motherhood! So in this post, let’s discuss some personal development around How to Know If You’re A Good Mom.
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I’m a working mom of a four-year-old. And I won’t lie. In the beginning, I constantly doubted my parenting abilities. Tell me that you can relate to all the questions that ran through my brain! Are we teaching her all the right things? Am I setting the best example? What daycare is good enough? Should I work? Am I working too much? Am I a better mom if I stay home? Do I spend enough quality time? How much screen time is too much? ALL THE THINGS.
How To Know If You’re A Good Mom
On top of all the questions running through our monkey mom minds, there’s the memes on social media that talk all about how moms are judging each other about everything and have us all wondering how to know if you’re a good mom. (i.e. breastfeeding, homeschooling, private school, tummy time, working, not working, screen time, and on and on and on.) And because I work with so many moms, creating picture perfect moments for celebrations in their lives, I know all about the pressure we put on ourselves to be good moms.
Here’s the thing though. All the things we question about being a good mom are stories about what it “means” to be a good mom. And guess what? That shit is all made up.
What exactly do I mean by that? Everything you THINK that is “good” or “bad” is a story that you either created from an experience you had in life or it was passed down to you from generations before you. The truth is, there really is no good or bad, until you label it good or bad. Therefore, nothing has any meaning except for the meaning we give it. Write that down. That is gold.
My Story of How to Know if You’re a Good Mom
For example, here’s some stories of my own. I am a working mom. I enjoy working, but often feel guilty that I should be staying home. Story. I wasn’t able to breastfeed because my nipples literally bled every time we tried. So we went with formula – something that some people would label as wrong. Story. Going on vacation, taking ME time, doing anything away from my daughter sometimes feels like crap. Story.
Notice that something is a story when you can’t pin it down as a fact. So if they aren’t real facts, guess what you can do? You can choose to create and believe a different story, something I’ve adopted and I want to encourage you to do as well.
Choose A New Story
Give yourself the gift of a new story. And here it is…I’m going to spoil it for you. You already are a good mom. A great mom. A fantastic and wonderful mom! Just the way you are.
Therefore, if there’s someone out there who chooses to think it’s “wrong” or “bad” to be a working mom or a stay at home mom or whatever the story may be. Remember, that’s a story they’ve adopted. Maybe it came from how they were raised, or how their friend turned out, but that’s not your story.
I am a good mom because I care to actually ask the question, “Am I a good mom?” And if you’re reading this, I bet you’ve asked yourself the very same thing. Relax into knowing that you were picked to be the mom to your children for a reason, so your story is unlike anyone else’s. You’re exactly where you’re supposed doing the things you need to do. Feels kinda freeing right?
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Lastly, thank you so much for taking the time to read about How To Know If You’re A Good Mom! I hope it made you realize that you are a good mom!! I love to help you celebrate life through party decorations and positivity! But above all, I’d love to connect with you. Reach out to me on Instagram and let’s chat. Get started celebrating your life! Grab your FREE gratitude journal printable or by subscribing to my podcast, The Celebration Effect Podcast! I can’t wait to connect with you more.